BRIDE BY ALI HAZELWOOD // spoiler-free book review: didn’t expect that this werewolf x vampire marriage of convenience romance would have me in a chokehold but here we are,,,

You know, you really should be proud of me. Like, look at me back again, maintaining an active posting schedule.

I shall do little yapping today because instead, I want to word vomit about THIS BOOK BECAUSE I’M OBSESSED?!?!?!?

Title: Bride
Series: Bride book #1
Author: Ali Hazelwood
Page count: 403
Date published: 6 February 2024
Genre: Adult paranormal romance

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Synopsis:

A dangerous alliance between a Vampyre bride and an Alpha werewolf becomes a love deep enough to sink your teeth into in this new paranormal romance from the New York Times bestselling author of The Love Hypothesis.

Misery Lark, the only daughter of the most powerful Vampyre councilman of the Southwest, is an outcast-again. Her days of living in anonymity among the Humans are she has been called upon to uphold an historic peacekeeping alliance between the Vampyres and their mortal enemies, the Weres, and sees little choice but to surrender herself in the exchange. Again . . .

Weres are ruthless and unpredictable, and their Alpha, Lowe Moreland, is no exception. He rules his pack with absolute authority, but not without justice. And, unlike the Vampyre Council, not without feeling. It’s clear from the way he tracks Misery’s every movement that he doesn’t trust her. If only he knew how right he was . . .

Because Misery has her own reasons to agree to this marriage of convenience, reasons that have nothing to do with politics or alliances, and everything to do with the only thing she’s ever cared about. And she is willing to do whatever it takes to get back what’s hers, even if it means a life alone in Were territory . . . alone with the wolf.

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STAR RATING: (5 out of 5 stars)

I’m starting to think that maybe I’m Ali’s biggest lover when she writes outside of STEM romance, and we could psychoanalyse that, but instead I want to screech about THIS BOOK!!! Like, even though I had to look up what a knot was, I couldn’t even care because this damn book had me in a CHOKEHOLD.

Let’s ignore that I thought this book would only be average, and was ready to move on with a slightly lower rating. It wasn’t until I wanted to reread it all over again the next day that I realised I was well and truly not okay.

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We always knew I loved a misty forest, so why are we shocked that this book did things for me? I shouldn’t be. Maybe that’s something I should actively start seeking out because clearly all of the best books have them.

Let’s talk plot, which, yes, is there in case you forgot, and is it wholly a requirement to my obsession? Absolutely not, I almost didn’t notice that there were political reasons to their marriage of convenience, but also, like I love it?

My peanut-loving girl, Misery, is absolutely EVERYTHING STFU AND DO NOT TALK TO ME. What do you mean she made me cry? What do you mean I related to her? Don’t even go there, or you’ll have me in therapy. We have such a similar sense of humour and deep love for the people around us, and oof definitely my favourite character Ali has written.

Moment of appreciation for the iconic siblings of both Misery and Lowe, I loved them. And all the side-characters tbh.

I have 1 criticism, and I feel I need a minute to slap Lowe. Sir, I was WAITING for THE CUTE LOVE TERMS OF ENDEARMENT. That’s literally the only negative thing I have to say.

Thank god Misery found herself a Lowe, but where is mine? I would like to order one to-go, please? Jeez, their romance was everything, and I don’t even have words. Can I just say chokehold and move on? It’s my review, and I will be.

You’ve all probably already read the book. But in case not, here’s me giving you a copy with both hands. I gaslit two of the ladies in my office to read it, so TRUST ME OKAY I PROMISE YOU WON’T BE LET DOWN!!!!

“The scent is growing into more than just a problem. It invades. It swirls. It travels. It sticks to his nose. It concentrates, sometimes. They rarely touch. When they did, her wrist accidentally brushed against the front of his shirt, and he found himself tearing off the piece of fabric where her smell was most intense. He slipped it in his pocket, and now carries it everywhere. Even as he leaves to avoid her.” 

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“Hope you packed a lint roller. I hear they shed.”

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When do you think your future husband will try to kill you?” Owen asks conversationally, looking straight ahead.

“Tomorrow? Next week?”

“Who’s to say.”

“Within the month, for sure.”

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“You need to be told the right things.” He shrugs casually, but the movement feels the opposite of casual. “That you’re intelligent, and incredibly skilled at what you do, and brave. That despite your weird belief that you’re heartless, you’re more genuinely caring than anyone I’ve ever met. That you’re so resilient, I can’t quite wrap my head around it. That you’re very . . .” He pauses. Wets his lips. My heartbeat skips. “Very beautiful to look at. Always so beautiful. And that—”

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“It hurt less, feeling alone among people who were never supposed to be my own.”

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“He shakes his head, eyes burning into mine. “You’re not a problem, Misery. You’re a privilege.”

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“God, you’re just so fluffy. And . . . sorry, but you’re kinda cute. I know you could murder me in less time than it takes to stick a straw in a blood bag. But you’re soft. And your coat is not even sparkly pink. I don’t know what you were embarrassed about, you majestic fluffball—yes, fine, I’m going.”

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“Her presence soothes him more than a full-moon run.”

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“He’s saying my name like a prayer. Like I’m the one thing standing between him and heaven on Earth.”

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“Misery,” Lowe orders, or maybe it’s a plea, or maybe my name is just a word he likes to say, a word he likes to think of.”

 

“I know you don’t like my scent.”

“I fucking love your scent.”

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“She wouldn’t admit it – she might not even realise it herself, but she’s the kind of person who would feel beholden to me. She would think I need her. When what I really need is for her to be happy, whether it’s with me, or alone, or with someone else.”

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HAVE YOU READ THIS BOOK? WHAT DID YOU THINK? HAVE YOU READ BOOK TWO? WHICH IS YOUR FAVOURITE? LET ME KNOW!